People of wisdom state: In order to be successful, we should not argue with or speak ill of or pick on anyone, for in such a case there is a danger that we may hurt a person's feelings (may Allah forbid!). Hadrat Imam an-Nawawi was both a scholar and a dear servant of Allah. However, he never got married. When people asked him, "Sir, you carry out all the obligatory and voluntary obligations and duties. But why do you not marry and follow this Prophetic practice [sunnah]?" he said in reply:
"I feel anxious that I may fall into forbidden actions while I am trying to perform a Prophetic practice. I fear greatly that I may hurt my wife's feelings or I may not earn sustenance through lawful means. Such fears are the reasons why I abstain from marrying. Is it possible not to be fearful of incurring divine punishment?"
It is not meant by these statements that people must not get married. Rather, marriage is a great blessing. A married person saves half of his religion, but at the same time he must not forget his spouse's rights. He who has learnt Islam fully and lives by it should not fear at all. However, he who has learnt or practices it wrongly will never be free from trouble and disasters. Problems and worries will not end in a house unless family members read a true Islamic book and put it into practice.
The lady whom a man marries is not a slave or a servant. Then what is her status? Our religious superiors stated: "Allahu ta'ala sent down from Paradise to the earth a blessing. But this blessing is not a copy of its original, but the real, genuine form itself. This blessing is a pious wife. A devout wife who wears hijab, guards her chastity, and performs acts of worship is a real blessing from Paradise."
One can only respect and love such a blessing of Paradise. Marriage is a beneficent gift, but married people have been put under a great responsibility. As a matter of fact, the most distressing questioning in the next world will be about human rights. Even prophets were afraid of the seventh question to be asked at the Sirat Bridge, which will be about the rights of human beings.
What is meant by the hadith-i sharif "Die before death" is as follows:
Our eyes will be opened in the Hereafter, and we will see all the facts. We will bitterly regret, but it will be of no avail. Then we must be regretful now before having regrets that day. We must feel sorry for the time we wasted doing nothing, for the sins we committed, for our misbehavior that hurt other people's feelings, that is, for all of our actions that were against our religion, because the time of regret will certainly come. We should assume that what will befall us after death has befallen us now and accustom ourselves to it. All of what is preached here today will actually happen in the world to come. For this reason, we should emigrate from this world to the next with preparations made in advance so that we may not be surprised there.
|